Shop Like a Collector, Not a Buyer

Let's talk about the differences.

In an essay I published last year about what good personal style has in common, I briefly touched on the concept of channeling a collector instead of a fashion retail buyer when you shop. More specifically, I mentioned how this mentality can help hone your sense of personal style, and the purchases that correspond with it. I’m going to expand on this principle in today’s newsletter.

Broadly speaking, fashion retail buyers are responsible for choosing what is stocked and sold in stores. The nature of this role obviously varies depending on the retailer in question, but for this exercise I’ll be making some generalizations about the field in order to illustrate my point. When I refer to a retail buyer below, picture someone who works for a big, mainstream department store (so in other words, not a cool indie boutique). 

I’ve broken down the five differences between shopping like a collector vs. a buyer below – along with my thoughts on why internalizing this distinction can transform how you think about acquiring new stuff. 

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Retail buyers shop according to a pre-planned schedule, but time of year is irrelevant to a collector.

I’d been searching for the perfect black velvet dress with white lace trim for a couple of years — specifically because I liked the idea of wearing one to holiday parties — when I finally found one on The RealReal for a great price. I bought it immediately… even though it was the middle of July.

Collectors don’t add to their collections simply because of a change in season. When you adopt this approach and avoid shopping for arbitrary reasons, you’ll have more freedom (budget, room in your closet, etc.) to shop for the right thing when you see it — even if it’s a black velvet dress in the height of summer.

Trends are integral to a retail buyer’s decision-making process, while a collector is driven largely by personal taste.

Bows have cycled in and out of the fashion zeitgeist quite a bit over the last decade. I’ve bought and worn bows consistently throughout this time period because I’ve always liked styling feminine accessories with fall/winter outfits to complement the heavier fabrics and more structured silhouettes.

Collectors may buy into certain trends, but they do so selectively — i.e. only when that trend speaks to an intrinsic sense of taste or proclivity that predates the trend in question. The goal is for taste to influence your relationship with trends, not for trends to mold your taste. They should be the footnote instead of the driving thesis behind your “collection.”

A retail buyer caters to the mass market, whereas a collector revels in the pursuit of rare treasures and unique finds.

The retail buyer vs. collector principle applies to home decor purchases, too. My antique headboard and Janie Kruse Garnett sheets are two of my favorite niche finds. I like that they don’t fit the mold of any of the currently popular, mass-produced interior aesthetics (Scandi minimalism, mid-century modern, etc.) — especially when paired together.

Taste is varied and subjective, but the characteristic that makes it good is immutable: singularity. Personal style with mass commercial appeal is an oxymoron. 

A retail buyer considers how each new item will complement the store’s buy for that particular season, whereas a collector thinks about how a new item will complement the whole of their collection not just now but also — more importantly — over the long-term.

Last fall I was obsessed with finding the perfect ankle-length coat. I finally found one secondhand that was 100% wool — a criterion that was just as important to me as how it looked.

The true value of a new item lies not just in its current or individual appeal, but in its ability to round out your collection for years to come. That’s why the quality, condition, and material composition of a new acquisition are just as important as the way it looks.

A retail buyer focuses on newness, but collectors are experts in what they already own and love.

I kissed a lot of frogs (i.e. bought a lot of terrible tiny sunglasses in my early twenties) before I realized the sunglasses I actually wanted to wear and enjoyed wearing were these two styles from Warby Parker and Lowercase. Not only do they actually suit my face, but they also do what sunglasses are supposed to do, i.e. shield my eyes from the sun. I haven’t felt compelled to buy another pair of sunglasses since.

The relationship you have with your existing stuff — what you wear the most, how you wear it, and why you wear it — is your most valuable data for evaluating future shopping decisions. Opting not to buy something after thoughtful consideration can be just as satisfying as making a purchase. Both choices reflect an equally confident understanding of what feels true to your aesthetic. 

Thoughts? Please feel free to share in the comments! I’m eager to discuss.

xo Harling